Hannibal Lecter X Platonic!reader - Blog Posts

Hannigram Parent Headcanons w/ a Hyperactive Reader

This entire thing is literally so stupid LOL. Enjoy :)

These guys have to keep you on a leash

You’re literally bouncing off the walls

Lost you in a store once (okay, so maybe not just once)

*You wanted a rainbow wiggly slug toy

Literally just stopped in the store & played with it for a solid 5-10 minutes

You were straight up entranced by that thing

Did they buy it for you when they eventually found you?

Yes, of course they did

They can’t say no to you :(

Will picks you up and spins you around!!!

You accidentally kicked Hannibal in the face while Will was doing that once in the morning

Will was spinning you around, greeting you that morning

Hannibal walked into the room with his robe on, tired, and with a hot cup of coffee in his hand

“Good morning my dear. I made you coffee-”

Only for his face to be met with a tiny pair of socked feet, smacking him wide awake

He spilled said coffee all over himself and the floor

He chastised both you and Will after that

You tire poor old Hannibal out

Will has to take his place sometimes during playtime lol

You’re a menace at the dinner table

Hannibal tries so hard to get you to follow the manners he set out for you

“Y/N. Y/N. Remember what we talked about? No talking with food in your mouth. You’ll choke, sweetheart.”

You do end up choking once

Literally give them a heart attack

Hannibal has to do the heimlich maneuver on you

You coughed up a few beans

You cried, but you were okay

You now have a mild fear of beans

One time you bit the babysitter

Will and Hannibal didn’t know whether to be mad at you or proud of you

You just looked up at them with the biggest smile on your face when they returned

I just have an image of Will and Hannibal sitting on the sofa in their robes in the early morning, their eyes dead and tired while a tiny child runs around the sofa in circles

So fun

Warning: A toy slug is under the cut. Maybe don't take a look if you don't like slugs. :3

*Said rainbow wiggly slug toy:

Hannibal & Will Parent Headcanons (Separate)

Because Will and Hannibal give off serious dad vibes (especially Will). The moment I laid eyes on Will, I was like: “You are my father now.”

Will:

Will is a Tired Single Dad™

He likes to ruffle your hair :3

If he took his eyes off of you for 1 second when you were younger, he’d lose you immediately

Chased you around the house a lot when you were younger & would swing you in his arms

This man needed so much caffeine just to stay awake

He brought you to work a lot because he couldn’t afford a babysitter, and the students made sure you were the center of attention lol

Sat you on his lap while he graded papers

Lots of cuddles by the space heater

Ngl, I think he’d spoil you a lot when you were younger

Like you’re just too cute to say no to, and he may not be rich, but he wants to give you the world

Lenient when it comes to grades

Just as long as you’re trying your best :)

BEST listener

You can literally come to him for anything, and he’ll sit there quietly until you’re done

Makes you feel understood & less alone

He’s always there for you and puts you first

Teaches you how to fish and how to do fly tying

Y’all go on trips out to the lake

He has you take pictures of him holding fish like the stereotypical dad he is, and he makes you do the same

Said photos of you are getting framed and put on his desk

Takes you even when it’s freezing, so y’all can go and sit out on the frozen lake

He’s definitely fallen in at least once

Calls you “kid” and “kiddo”

He’s okay at cooking, like not the best, but certainly not the worst

Lots of fish for dinner

Y’all dressed up for Halloween together once despite living in the middle of nowhere

Sat by the fire and told spooky stories while eating a little too much candy

This man would literally would die for you

______________________________________________________________

Hannibal:

I’m sorry, but he’s kinda strict

Not like full-on authoritarian, but he’s got lots of rules he expects you to follow to a T

Bedtime at 9:00 sharp, and you WILL be getting your needed 8+ hours of sleep

If you wanna go out somewhere?

Where are you going? For how long? Who will be there? Does he need to drop you off and/or pick you up? Will there be a trusted adult with you? Are you done with your homework yet? And what about chores?

Absolutely ZERO boyfriend, girlfriend, and/or romantic partner allowed until you’re like 27

And no phone until you reach high school

He still loves you, though ^^

When you were younger, he’d read you bedtime stories to help you fall asleep

Y’all would have matching outfits & pajamas

Liked to keep you in his arms a lot

When you misbehaved, he’d get down on your level and gently but firmly chide you

Packs the BEST lunches

Literally eating like royalty

He’s making sure you’re getting all your necessary proteins, vegetables, fruits, etc.

He’d probably teach you Lithuanian

He’d also teach you how to play the harpsichord and definitely played lullabies on it for you when you were younger

Frequently checks how you’re doing in school

Probably goes to parent-teacher conferences

Helps you with your homework if he’s not busy ^^

If he is busy, he’ll hire a tutor to help you

Shows you off to all his friends and coworkers

Literally so proud of you

Yes, he makes you attend his fancy dinner parties

And if you have any musical talent, he is 100% making you play in front of everyone to show off how skilled you are

If anyone is rude to you, he will eat them…eventually

You don’t need to know that, though

Better for you to remain blissfully unaware