Latest Posts by goddessofspunk - Page 7
A little tribute :)
Peter, to a random spider: Dude, pay the rent or leave, because, you’re not even washing the dishes anymore, and I just think that’s such a dick move.
May:
Tony:
Happy:
Pepper:
Natasha: Yeah, dude. Pay up or move out.
Peter: I love that there are so many strong female heroes
Peter: There's Captain Mom, Spider Mom, Bug Mom, Alien Bug Mom, General Mom, Iron Mom, Scarlet Mom, Pegasus Mom, Blue Mom, Green Mom, SHIELD Mom,
tony, being raised by jarvis and peggy, and growing up to have a british accent
Peter: The gods gave me depression because if my ambitions went unchecked I would have bested them all in hand to hand combat by age 13
Thor, local Norse God, dropping Peter off at his psychiatrist: *sweats*
I hereby present you a new headcanon (oh joy)
Carol and Bucky, weird but dynamic duo
Just,, think about it
Captured by the enemy? Check
Brainwashed? Check
Basically made to kill innocents? Check
Done with everything? Check
Gay af? Check
I mean, they’d bond instantly, crack weird jokes and kick ass 24/7
~*~*~*~
[First meeting, Carol offhandedly mentions being a lesbian]
Bucky: oh yeah I love lesbians
Carol: [narrows eyes] what
Bucky: yeah me an’ Stevie used to escort them girls at parties and stuff with the double date excuse so they could go to their actual dates without anyone knowing *launches into ten minutes rant because a good suppressed memory just resurfaced*
Carol:
Carol: [calling Fury] Nick why didn’t you introduce me to this one earlier
~*~*~*~
[June]
Nick: what are you two up to now
Bucky and Carol, wearing rainbow themed shirts with matching pants, stuffing at least four rainbow flags in their backpacks and filling their pockets with glitter boxes: it’s gay time
Steve: how was the honeymoon?
Stephen: Tony got drunk and tried to set our marriage certificate on fire
Stephen: he said “good luck trying to return me without the receipt”
Ned: Do you really think you can keep being Spiderman a secret from everyone?
Peter: Hannah Montana did it and all she had was a wig.
News reporter, on live television: I'm here with Peter Parker, who was publicly outed against his will 4 hours ago. Mr Parker, a few words?
Peter, crying: EVERYONE KNOWS I'M BI???
News reporter:
News reporter: well now we do
What Peter said: you’re saying there’s… A muLTIVERSE? :D
What Peter meant: tonytonytonytonytonyALTERNATEMEMEStonytonySCIENCEtonytonytonytonyMOREPETERStonytonytonytonytonYTONYTONYTON-
Happy, then: ugh, kids.
Happy, now: If Anyone Fucking L O O K S At Morgan Stark Or Peter Parker I Will Rip Them To Shreds With My Own Two Hands. I Won't Hesitate. Try It Bitch. I Dare You. If You So Much As B R E A T H In The Direction Of Tony's Kids, I Will Rip Out Your Intestines And Give Them To Morgan To Use As A Jump Rope. You Think I'm Fucking Joking? Test That Theory, See What Fucking Happens, Ass Hat. Fuck You.
Loki transforms himself into a snake and waits for his next victim to approach. Peter enters the room.
Peter: Awe look at the little snek. So smooth, so wiggly, so good.
Loki/Snake: *sticks out tongue*
Peter: Yep, this is one great snek. 10 out of 10 would boop his snoop. *reaches out and lightly pokes snake on the nose* Boop!
Loki/Snake: *blink*
Peter: Well I gotta go patrol. Bye bye smol snek!
Peter leaves the area. Loki transforms back as Thor enters the room
Thor: What happened to proving you feel no attachment to the Spider child?
Loki: His levels of innocence and purity has cracked my stone cold heart. I cannot explain it any other way.
Can we just have a moment of silence for T'challa and the inevitable mockery he'll have to face once Cats (2019) came out in the MCU.
---
T'challa: your life of crime is OVER, Carl, give it up. Even your gods can't help you now. Any last words as a free man?
Carl the villain: you were great on Cats
T'challa:
T'challa: on what-
---
*later that day*
---
T'challa: Shuri. I need your help.
Shuri: I'm busy go away
T'challa: no listen I told today's villain to speak his last words as a free man and he wasted it on "You were great on Cats" so is that some kind of new-age white people phrase or some-
T'challa:
T'challa: why are you laughing
Sebastian Stan, Tom Hiddleston, Tom Holland, Tessa Thompson, Chris Evans, and Brie Larson: *talk about the possibility of their characters being lgbtq+*
Marvel:
FAMILY