Sometimes I Think About How For A Very Brief Moment Even Lee Dongsik's Best Friends Of 30 Years Suspected

sometimes I think about how for a very brief moment even lee dongsik's best friends of 30 years suspected that he could be the murderer and how it just displays how lonely dongsik was even in the company of his near and dear ones. the implications of him giving his all to them but his trauma and grief and his reaction to these creating a wall between him and his beloveds, separating him from them, sowing the seeds for suspicion in a bond lasting multiple decades. I wonder how dongsik reacted when he learnt that they suspected him too, i wonder if he would've bitterly laughed it off thinking how it was logical for them to think that way that it was common sense for jihwa and jeongjae to point the needle towards him. why? well because isn't he the resident suspect, isn't he crazy enough to do it, isn't that who he is.

but the truth is he is not. i wonder if even as he bitterly laughed a needle would've struck in his heart, if he would've thought why can no one ever trust me. what is it that I did that even my own friends can consider the option of suspecting me.

More Posts from Aprilsray and Others

3 years ago

Asexual Lesbians only have 4 moods...

- Constant yearning for a gf

- Trying to fit in both the lesbian community and the asexual community

- Doubting one identity or the other constantly

- Calling yourself a lesbian because you don't want to keep lecturing people on asexuality

3 years ago

what are some of your favorite lesbian books?

some of these have bi characters but if there’s romance involved they’re f/f, also this is not in any particular order i was just going down my goodreads,,,

ya —

not my problem by ciara smyth

her name in the sky by kelly quindlen

the falling in love montage by ciara smyth

the last true poets of the sea by julia drake

the miseducation of cameron post by emily m danforth

na/adult —

girls of summer series by kate christie (not finished with this yet but so far it’s good!)

one last stop by casey mcquiston

endgame by zoe reed

those who wait by haley cass

written in the stars by alexandria bellefluer

plain bad heroines by emily m danforth

everything leads to you by nina lacour

the athena protocol by shamim sarif

the seven husbands of evelyn hugo by taylor jenkins reid

3 years ago

re: terms of endearment, the tibetan nyingdu-la, which translates roughly to “most honored poison of my heart” - the translation being im sure only a fraction as breathtaking as it is in tibetan - haunts me day in and day out

3 years ago

stop making fun of bad people for being fat or having small dicks or being socially awkward or whatever else you seem to think is a fair target. none of that shit has anything to do with why theyre bad. i don't care if a nazi has a stutter or a terf has thinning hair or whatever. at best youre missing the point, at worst your comments are gonna hurt vulnerable people more than they will ever affect the shitty person you're mocking. why are you so attached to these bullshit standards anyway?

1 year ago
Annie Ernaux, From A Girl's Story

Annie Ernaux, from A Girl's Story

Text ID: her desire and madness, her idiocy and pride, her hunger and her blood that ceased to flow.

3 years ago

book rec list in honor of the start of pride month 🏳️‍🌈

some of my favorite lgbt+ novels!!

the priory of the orange tree by samantha shannon (high fantasy, lesbian mc, bisexual mc, gay mc, asexual mc, f/f)

the locked tomb trilogy by tamsyn muir (horror sci-fi space opera, literally so many lesbian main characters)

giovanni’s room by james baldwin (literary fiction, gay mc, m/m)

the last true poets of the sea by julia drake (young adult fiction, bisexual main character, f/f)

music from another world by robin talley (historical fiction, epistolary, bisexual mc, lesbian mc, f/f)

tell it to the bees by fiona shaw (historical fiction, wlw main characters, f/f)

aristotle and dante discover the secrets of the universe by benjamin ailre sáenz (young adult fiction, gay main characters, m/m)

this is how you lose the time war by amal el-mohtar and max gladstone (sci-fi time travel novella, epistolary, wlw main characters, f/f)

on earth we’re briefly gorgeous by ocean vuong (literary fiction/autofiction, epistolary, gay main character)

plus two im currently reading: 

one last stop by casey mcquiston (contemporary romance novel, new adult, bisexual mc, lesbian mc, trans supporting character, gay supporting character, f/f)

left hand of darkness by ursula k. le guin (science fiction, trans/gnc characters)

plus two im hoping to read this month:

confessions of the fox by jordy rosenberg (historical fiction, trans mc)

last night at the telegraph club by malinda lo (historical fiction, young adult, wlw main characters)

3 years ago

omg i have been dying to find fruity desi ppl 😭

are here any cool fruity ass desi people here??

3 years ago

being in my 20s is like I understand more of my mother and less than i ever have. My childhood friends are strangers to me and there’s no one i know better. i want to drink wine. i never stopped wanting to climb trees. i know more than I’ve ever known before. I don’t know anything at all. i’m seven years old and sixteen and twenty nine and seventy. I can’t tell when i'm happy. I think the only thing that will make me happy is to be little again. i want to be really old. i go to the ocean and feel like nothing matters more than that. in my bedroom everything matters so much. I go to the grocery store every day. i know how to cook a lot of things but the only thing i know how to eat is fried eggs. I can take care of myself but i want to be taken care of. i want to go home and I don't know where that is. i think it may be somewhere inside of me but i’m not sure

3 years ago

Being ace and being a lesbian is a very unique experience. Like, I’m exclusively attracted to women. Women are works of Art. But I have no desire to do anything sexual.

I just want to wake up every morning next to my beautiful wife and spend each day getting to hug her and make her coffee every morning and maybe feed chickens together while holding hands. I want to make her bread and bake her favorite pie becuase I love her So Much but I don’t have to have sex with her to make me feel loved.

I feel like love is a hot coffee on a cold day made by your favorite person and when they smile all you want to do is stare forever. The sun could explode and you wouldn’t be able to tell because they’re brighter than the sun anyway.

I know for me the sun is a woman. I don’t want to fuck the sun.

Edit: Trans women are women so like, no TERFs. Y’all already took the word “radical” which was awesome in its own right, y’all don’t get this.

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